Never Sweat The Competition

Line from Kanye's verse on "All Your Fault"

I've never had to worry about my competition but my competition have always had to worry about me. You can't compete with someone if they can only bring a knife to a gun fight. You lose before it even begins and you can't even question how you've lost if you don't have an even playing field to begin with.

People are so concerned with fighting the new, that they forget what their advantage was what got them into that position in the first place, yet their competition had nothing on them. But that's down to ones ability to recognize their own worth and ability to be the best. 

The competition might want your spot, the competition might want your position and hell, they might even get it. But your position wasn't able to be fulfilled the way you filled it. The way that it needed to be filled to become irrelevant. But you're so concerned about who you compete with you that you forget your spot is your spot. 

I would fight to keep my position but then I'd be too focused on the smaller aspect of my situation and what I learnt was your competition can steam roll you if you're not working on the bigger picture and not letting you keep building upon you and your brand. 

They'll find a weakness in your armour and they'll pry it open to get to you, they'll stab you where it hurts and then they'll look to inflict more damage if possible. I don't let that happen to me because as soon as I give the ability of control away they'll use it to neglect your wellbeing and your dream. I worked too hard to be phased by those who hadn't worked the hours I've worked or as hard as I've worked to be here. 

Not to mention, the harder you work, the harder it is to focus on other factors of your life which require attention. So when individuals show that they're interested in being part of the team and show the willingness to work on your projects with you then you can't say no. More hands make light work. 

I'll never settle for easy, its like saying your effort was only worth second place. But second place is the first to lose and I'm not okay with that. I fight for my place in the world and no one can take it away from me. Only those who don't realize your worth are the ones to lose when you're the real winner. The industry is hard, they'll recognize certain individuals for their efforts due to being favourites yet those who should be rewarded are neglected by the system because they can't bare to see you win. 

But if you already know that you're the winner, the industry becomes the loser in the situation. But so many people fight for recognition like it matters. The throne might contain the spotlight but when you  work this hard, you begin to realize that the spotlight isn't on you for a reason. 

We can steal the spotlight by yelling what about me but at the end of the day, you've got more work to be doing and the spotlight will eventually come at the right time for you. Regardless of the circumstances if you know you're worth and perfect your craft how can you worry about other people's opinions? They'll only take away from your belief by insinuating you're not good enough. But the industry already knows, the spotlight knows, the world knows. They'll keep crowning jokers until the king is ready. 

And we all know, those who aren't made for the job, can't keep it. They can't do it as well as someone who knows what they're doing, knows how to touch the hearts of their people and can move their kingdom forward. 

Awards, don't hold weight when people know you're not the right recipient and the trophies won't matter if you're being the best you. Focus on yourself and not on the competition. Focus on the details that separate you from society and the reward is seeing how far you've been able to progress yourself and your dreams. 

Blossoming Love in a Dark Room

In collaboration with @elegantvisionary on Instagram 

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Darkness had evoked my life. Doubt of finding love ever again seemed unimaginable. I had accepted the fact that my bed would be empty with my heart spending eternity yearning for another. I had become a rose in a dark room waiting for you to resurrect the passion and that's when you came to me.

It wasn't planned, it wasn't written, it wasn't scripted. I had climbed out of the depths of hell to be with you in the heights of heaven. I could see the world again in a new love. In a love that I could finally share with you.

I had been appreciated as the rose I had always been. Covered in a little dirt but you saw the potential in me girl. No longer a weed in a diminishing love story but a rose in a new fairytale.

Love can now blossom once again.

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...and then my life changed when I met you. For the first time I saw something so incredible, so radiant, so brilliant, and so intriguing - that I found myself mesmerized by you. You were the person I wanted to share every breath, every memory, every smile with. I was prepared to love you with my being. To support and trust and cherish you. You made me realize that life is and can be so much more, with you.

For every crevice in your hear that I won't be able to mend, I will offer a new opportunity for it to be imbued with love. For every caress, whisper, and fascinating thought, I will give you the world. My affection for you has become raw and powerful because you have opened up a sensation of transfixing and intoxicating wonder in me. The depth of your mind has become my affinity. Allow me to explore you for as long as I have you.

Young Love Grows Old

I haven't wrote a blog in awhile. It's long overdue but if you follow on me on Instagram (@jrerdeg) you'll see constant streams of consciousness of ideas, creativity, motivation and love.
After going to the Drake concert in Melbourne, I had realised that I had been on a trip back through the last 7 years.

I had been through the same process of maturity from being young and vulnerable as well as in love, to the slow progression of having a mentality where life is for the taking and that confidence knowing who you are.. it can make you or break you. I mean the journey of course.

Young love was beautiful but it grows old quickly, you can be very infatuated with the one you fell in love with but it can quickly turn around on its head. None more so then when I was younger.
I lost faith in the words of those I loved, it was no longer new and shiny. It had become a grim reality that those you love can hurt you even kill you. I had taken my love and let it burn like a candle in the dark and let it be my guiding light to my current position.

I had came from being smitten in love to someone who would constantly fear the worst then to a heartbroken man trying to piece their life back together again. That was one of the highest points in my life in terms of how I could develop and find myself.

That began my journey. My life didn't begin until 2012. In the last 3 years, I was able to develop hundreds of ideas, find my true calling, my passions, grasp an understanding of people and life in general and just build on me.

As a part of my transition into my new life, I had broken hearts. Thus starting a new lesson to learn from. Girls who were amazing in their own right but my focus wasn't there. I had regretted my mistakes and the pain that I caused to people I truly cared about. I just was too young to understand the implications of my mistakes. But it had its necessity for me to learn and grow from.
Later on, I had to go through another situation where it forced me to grow and expand my horizons. Or well highlight my faults. But at that time, I was on a high. A high that had been built over a 2 year period due to realisation that I'm a rare breed. It had taken me back down to earth to keep developing but still with a confidence level very similar to Drake's Worst Behaviour and Headlines.
I knew who I was, I knew who I am to become. I had been given a blueprint to greatness all from a love that had grown old but perhaps had become mouldy.

Now I'm at a point in my life where love has become a dance of uncertainty. Unsure of where the next move is to be, I want to move away to Paris or Milan and fall in love with the city. In love with the art, the culture, the people I had grown so fond of here in Melbourne, that I no longer know what it's like to start a new flame.

I need a new flame in my life to set me alight, even though right now i'm the burning man, its for a different reason. I guess its different seasons, the transition from summer to winter and now back to summer. Well, I mean figuratively of course. The snow is melting and the beauty of a new world has been opened up to me like the closet in Narnia.
I'm falling in love all again, but with my dreams not women. The passion I can no longer find in the game of love had been replaced by my dreams while I slowly find who is worth my last name.
But life changes when your focus changes, your attitude changes, your mentality and everything in between. It's amazing as well as it is scary.

You could never go back to who you were a few years ago because your growth had changed your perspective. I never use to be as creative or geared to creativity as I am right now. I didn't feel this type of passion nor did I feel its severity. Its become a new love to me, its a young type of love but a love that is timeless.

No matter how old it gets, it will always be relevant to me and my life.
I wish I could share my whole life and let you feel how I feel and see the world I see it. But it's impossible. Hence why my blog and my Instagram exist.

Every little experience that I've had to experience before this had become a domino effect that lead me here. The next few years are going to be difficult, with about 10+ projects to work on that are aligned with my passions. But she was right all along, I needed to focus on the dream.
I'd raise my glass to the future but i'd rather raise it to my accomplishments.

A visionary finally able to be set free his creativity. All thanks to a little love and Hennessey.
A drunken mess that lead to a hangover which helped me find the right storyline for my own fairytale.
A story written one chapter at a time, don't rush me. I'm trying to get it right.